Kaye’s Inner Mind

Happiness have I found you?  I don’t know.

I have been a good daughter, a good sister and a good friend.  In my 32 years of existence, I have always tried not to step on someone’s shoes, tried to please everybody, did everything I could for a friend, loved and failed and then loved and failed again.  The heartache goes on and on and on.

I don’t yearn too much, just a simple life I always say.  Having my family around and friends make them even more perfect.  But who am I not to yearn for more?  Who am I not to hope that someday I would find the happiness that I have been longing for.  Who am I not to wish that I can be happy like anybody else?  Isn’t that hard to ask?  Tell me.

Funny, a friend told me just now that I look good in my new pictures. Just playing with my phone, I told her.  And then I took a look at one picture, my eyes glisten, my hair shine, my lips smile, I look thin (eventhough I am fat, hehe), but then again I said to myself, it is just a picture.  A picture that has no meaning.  Glistening eyes, does that mean I am inlove?  Shiny hair, does that mean I am inspired?  Smiling lips, does that mean I am happy?  I don’t know….all is just a big facade, an epitome of what I want to be.

So if anybody asks me if I have found that happiness yet….I hope so, i hope so, but…..only time can tell.

kbk/07/23/06

This entry was posted on Sunday, July 23rd, 2006 at 7:25 pm and is filed under Uncategorized. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can skip to the end and leave a response. Pinging is currently not allowed.